Its not the way its suppose to be...

finally its happening to me...
Last week was a power house. A lot has happened in an instant. And yes! I met a lot of people...exchanged numbers...flirted.... and was suppose to have a date after 10 billion years....
Then there comes the conflict. I never go for "tira-tira" or "scraps" or"should I say, I dont go for something I don't own from the start"...is it really owning something or someone?

I did something stupid before and I dont want a repeat performance. Its like eating my own words and eating something that I'm proudly standing for.

"Should I go out on a date with a friend's super duper duper crush???"

I dont like like the guy...but I have this form of flattery right now,, and honestly speaking.."IT FEELS GOOD"....

sO should i say "Come what may?"
or should i say "Nevermind"

My friend told me "ITS OK"---- but im a firm believer that saying ok has 2 sides-- being OK inside, and being OK outside.....and for the situation, I can say that its from the OUTSIDE....its easy to pretend being ok about it, but still.....
haaaaay
I'll be single forever...
Hopefully not
so help me God

CRAVING

I wished they serve this here in the Philippines so Mcdo for me would be guilt free. Most of my friends including me had tweeted or even plurked about the "twister fries" comeback..."I LOOOOVVVVEEEE IT"... I.C and I even talked about it for 5 minutes while drinking our usual cocktail at bugsy's. We talked about how we love those long curly-spiral fries and laughed about how some pieces looked like (ching-a-ling) hahahahha.
We all have this certain craving for something....I crave a lot on certain things... some are guilty pleasure. I was talking to a gay-friend in class, and he told me about his craving for "macho-dancers"...its like drugs to him. Cravings usually keeps us alive, makes us happy...for a moment...then you'll move on, and crave for some more. Like in my case, I've been sober for a quite some time, and it kills me talking about it. The adrenaline rush I feel...the flash backs....stop it!

How long does a craving last? Is it like being on a break-up, then you'll move on but keeps on thinking about it...so you'll find a rebound? Do I need something else to crave about?

Its all in the mind! Cheers to that!

DROUGHT

Its been a while since I last blogged about something...which means its been a while since I had those "drunken-restless-nights".... I'm being so "papansin" on twitter and plurk, so now its time to blog about my restless thoughts :'-(

a lot has happend already...M.J and Farrah may they rest in peace.... Pao and Jam's birthday...school got cancelled and resumed cause of A(H1N1) VIRUS... etc.etc....AND BEYOND THAT, IM STILL SINGLE

Sex and the City marathon is very much unhealthy for me.....yes! Im currently experiencing "M.V.I.D"---->(wanna guess what that means?!?).... I was able to absorb everything during those random hangouts with ish, kat and con plus a venti of coffee(non-fat by the way) and tall green tea..(my stomach went wild).

Its been a while since I blogged, since I updated my multiply, checked my myspace, had un-prescripted drugs, went on a date, in a relationship........in short, ITS BEEN A WHILE...IM STILL SINGLE!! Hey! whats wrong with me. Yup, I strongly agree "IM A SAMANTHA JONES.....but samantha is not experiencing drought...and I am....

Its been 8 months and still counting....Its my choice and not by circumstance...or somehow I can say "vice-versa",,,,,,,, I'm becoming restless about it..

iSH was right when she told me that "I'm looking for a guy that I can show and tell"

JaM was right when he said "Im looking at the wrong places"

Mario was right when he said " Im choosy and very hard to please"

Damn!

Recap!---- I'm very easy to please, I'm often restless, I drink a lot(but rarely gets drunks), I think I'm low maintenance(i think..hmmm), I can make a fool out of my self (when I'm comfortable with you), I can talk about wrestling and basketball, I can,,,,,,I can,..... be whatever you like......and YES! IM SINGLE!

I'm 21 and alone.....

Its 2:28am in the morning....

will sign off and contemplate